WASHINGTON– In an effort to create more racial equity, Joe Biden promised to stick a crack pipe into the mouth of every black citizen in the country. To accomplish this daunting task, the president created the US Crack Pipe Distribution Department and appointed his highly talented son Hunter as head of the new division.
With Black History Month only being 28 days, Biden said he wanted to get the crack smoking program going as quickly as possible and promised everyone that Hunter Biden is the best man for the job.
“Hunter is the smartest, brightest, most talented expert in the area of crack smoking technology,” said Biden to reporters as Hunter gave a demonstration on proper crack pipe etiquette. “My son Hunter spent years in the best college university earning his degree in crack smoking studies.”
After offering the crowd of news reporters a hit of his pipe, Hunter put his clothes back on and then said that he takes his job very seriously and promises to put in long hours at the Crack Pipe Division office making sure every single crack pipe works perfectly before distributing them to the nation’s black population.
“What kind of cruel person would give a black man a crack pipe without making sure it works first,” said Hunter, sweating profusely. “There’s one thing the Biden clan is not and that’s definitely not racist.”
Exactly
He’s an expert on crackology.