OTTAWA, CANADA– In an effort to regain control of Canada, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has gotten tough by donning the outfit worn by The Humungus from the movie The Road Warrior and telling the band of freedom-seeking truckers to “just walk away” and he’ll “spare their lives.”
While standing on top of his super stunning Prius vehicle dressed in his leather-clad outfit, Trudeau grabbed a microphone and sent a message out to the vast crowd of laughing people.
“There has been too much violence, too much pain,” said Trudeau as Ottawa police officers put their heads down in shame. “But I have an honorable compromise. Just walk away. Give me your pump, the oil, the gasoline, and your trucks, and I’ll spare your lives.”
As dozens of truckers honked their horns in order to drown out his lispy voice, an angry Trudeau added, “Just walk away and I’ll give you a safe passageway in Ottawa. I await your answer. You have a full day to decide.”
A teary-eyed Trudeau began crying uncontrollably at the sight of so many people laughing and pointing at him, causing the irrational dictator to unleash some Canada geese he had hidden inside his vehicle.
“I am gravely disappointed, you have made me unleash my geese of war,” said Trudeau, opening the door to his car only to watch the birds fly away.
Being that his Mad Max gimmick failed to scare off the truckers, Trudeau came back later on in the day dressed as the crossdressing villain Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs in an attempt to hopefully sicken everyone enough that they’ll just give up and leave.
