WASHINGTON– Former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s new book The Fart Of The Deal has exploded onto every major book selling site, now topping Amazon’s popular top ten list of highest selling titles this week.
Pelosi claims her new book was mildly inspired by President Donald Trump’s worldwide bestselling 1987 business book The Art Of The Deal, focusing less on actual business and more on the gaseous habits that affects almost every single person on the planet.
While Trump’s book dealt with jetting around and huge deals, Pelosi’s recent publication covers wetting brown and splooge queels.
The opening line of The Fart Of The Deal shows how serious Pelosi takes the flatulent subject matter.
“I don’t do it for the farts,” she writes in the book’s opening line. “I’ve got enough, much more than I’ll ever need. I do it to do it. Farting is my art form.”
During a book signing in Mierda, California, the Democrat author talked vaguely about how farts have been used for centuries as a way to leverage an advantage over the competition, whether dealing with world leaders or an annoying spouse.
Without giving too many details away, she said that she’s using the techniques written in The Fart Of The Deal to defeat Trump in the impeachment inquiry.
“I don’t need anybody’s farts,” she stated as she signed books for her avid fans. “It’s nice. I don’t need anybody’s sharts. I’m using my own cheek slappers. I’m not using Metamucil. I’m not using Benefiber. I don’t care. I’m really bloated.”
In a recent interview on CNN she discussed her ability to expel anal wind, saying, “People said, ‘Oh, well maybe she’s not as gassy as everybody thinks you are.’ Well, it turned out I’m much gassier.”
