MONTPELIER, VERMONT– Sen. Elizabeth Warren was in typical Sanders but not Sanders style Monday while giving a speech in front of a massive crowd of Bernie but not Bernie supporters when a potential voter stood up from the boisterous crowd and asked a very pressing question.
“How can we get Bernie Sanders to stop copying your style?” The inquisitive woman asked as Warren paced around the stage in a men’s blue suit that she says she’s worn long before Bernie ever adopted the fashion.
Before the voter even finished her robotic question, Warren responded, “Great question, fellow non-Bernie supporting citizen with an honest organic inquiry.
“As the world is full aware, I’ve been representing this great state of Vermont as Senator for the last 12 years and I have never once changed my stance on any political topics, unlike my female opponent Mr. Sanders who has flip-flopped back and forth regarding his ethnicity, socialist views, and even going as far as claiming that he has lost a job due to his pregnancy.”
Warren went on to ask the town hall crowd a very serious question, “How can someone like Bernie Sanders be trusted as President of the United States when he lied in the past about being a Native American woman just to get preferential treatment in college?”
As numerous Warren supporters flashed “Feel The War” signs, she added, “Unlike Bernie, I’m a true man of the people and I don’t have to put on an act just to win over potential voters. For example, like the time Bernie recorded himself at home with his husband drinking a beer. Ugh, totally staged.”
Warren’s comments come after her opponent former Vice President Joe Biden called her “an angrier, uglier Sanders wannabe”. Even though Biden didn’t name her directly, Warren assumed that he must have been referring to her other opponent Bernie Sanders because she is already more Sanders than Sanders.
That’s when she fired back on Twitter with a sarcastic tweet saying, “Yes, I am an angrier, uglier Sanders wannabe and I own it. Lol.”
A random spokeswoman that most people have never heard of told The Washington Post, “Labeling Warren as an angrier, uglier Sanders wannabe is a well-worn strategy when it comes to attacking a woman who has been the real Sanders for decades. Voters won’t support a woman who steals Sanders’ campaign policies, but they’ll vote for a man like Bernie Sanders who they think is the real Sanders, but isn’t.”
