WASHINGTON– A White House whistleblower told lawmakers that more than two dozen denials for insecurity have been overturned during the Trump administration.
Longtime White House whistleblower Tricia Blewhard told the Reform Committee that she faced dozens of denials of insecurity by colleagues who were jealous of her ability to play several different pop tunes on her personal whistle.
These denials of insecurity were later disproved despite her repeated concerns about snickering behind her back, gossiping in bathrooms, and leaving messages on her personal answering machine of Hillary Clinton‘s shrill voice.
Blewhard said she told her superiors that the mockery was not in the best interest of the country and that she faced retaliation after informing them that presidential son-in-law Jared Kushner was one of the insecurity deniers.
All of the insecurity deniers has denied being insecure about their skills as a whistleblower.
Blewhard claims that anyone can just blow into a whistle, but that it takes special skill to be able to make recognizable tunes out of it.
In light of the recent whistleblowing controversy, President Trump has signed an executive order banning all whistles from government buildings, including the White House. The new order also states that whistling without a whistle is acceptable, especially when catcalling pretty women.
