Tag: Rated PG

The Lincoln Project Promises They’ll Use Real Racists For Their Next Stunt By Hiring Democrat Politicians

CHARLOTTESVILLE, VIRGINIA-- The anti-Republican, Republican group The Lincoln Project is facing intense…

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Biden And France’s Macron Settle Their Differences By Competing In Televised Mud Wrestling Match

ROME, ITALY-- Presidents Joe Biden and Emmanuel Macron met in Rome today…

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Obama Visits New Jersey To Teach Governor Phil Murphy How To Better Lie To Voters Before Election

TRENTON, NEW JERSEY-- Former President Barack Hussein Obama spent some time in…

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Thousands Of Dogs Crap On Dr. Fauci’s Lawn In Solidarity After Hearing About His Canine Testing Experiments

WASHINGTON, D.C.-- Immediately after hearing the upsetting news that their canine brothers…

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Trump Launches Own Social Network Called ‘Facebook And Twitter Can Kiss My Orange Ass Social’

PALM BEACH COUNTY, FLORIDA-- Nine months after letting the world see for…

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At 189 Years Old, Nancy Pelosi Says She’s Almost Ready To Retire From Political Office…Almost

WASHINGTON-- Former Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi reaffirmed a promise she…

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Heroic: Roll of Toilet Paper Comes Out As Paper Towel, Proves It Has More Uses Than For Just Wiping

FLINT, MICHIGAN-- A toilet paper roll from Michigan is being heralded as…

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Emperor Biden Builds Coliseum To Feed All The Unvaccinated Americans To Hungry Lions

WASHINGTON-- Tired of waiting around for the rest of the country to…

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The Ubiquitous Brandon Makes An Appearance At Latest Trump Rally

DES MOINES, IOWA-- The sports stadium celebrity known only as "Brandon" made…

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Lizard Person Bill Gates Accidentally Squirts Venom Into Reporter’s Eyes During Intense Interview

NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Microsoft co-founder and vaccine candy man Bill…

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Maskless Science Denier Still Waiting Patiently To Die Any Day Now

PORTLAND, OREGON-- For the last year and a half, a local maskless…

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FBI Agents Bravely Stop Domestic Terrorist Parent From Putting Apple Into Child’s School Lunch Bag

BOULDER, COLORADO-- Brave FBI agents arrested a Boulder woman this morning after…

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