US Officials Claim Russians Planted Coke Inside White House To Make Biden’s Son Look Like A Crackhead American Loser
WASHINGTON-- A new breakthrough in the mystery of how cocaine ended up…
Upcoming ‘Cocaine Bear’ Sequel Has The Bear Seeking Drug Addiction Treatment
HOLLYWOOD-- Due to the massive popularity of the first Cocaine Bear movie,…
Police Bust Local Catnip Dealer After Officers Pose As Cats
BURLINGTON, VERMONT-- Police in Vermont are being heralded as heroes for busting…
With New Jersey’s Ban On Plastic, Black Market Selling Of Plastic Bags On The Rise
TRENTON, NEW JERSEY-- After New Jersey Governor Phil Murphy signed into law…
Disney’s Tigger Arrested For Crack Cocaine In Florida Sting Operation
ORLANDO, FLORIDA-- Florida police have arrested 69 individuals, including famous Disney character…
Pfizer Breathes Sigh Of Relief As Americans Now Focused On Russia
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- Drug company Pfizer has been doing the happy…
Numerous New Democrats Suddenly Running For Congress After Local Mental Institution Closes
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- A slew of up and coming Democrat politicians have…
Physician’s Hippocratic Oath Updated To ‘First, Do As Pfizer Says’ To Reflect Modern Medicine
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS-- To better reflect the state of current modern medical practice,…
Local Man Quits Vaccine Addiction For Much Safer Heroin Habit
SEATTLE, WASHINGTON-- In an effort to wean himself off the more hardcore…
New Sesame Street Movie Shows Muppets Getting Beaten And Robbed While Lost In New York City
HOLLYWOOD-- It might be a good idea to leave the children home…
Millions Of Unvaccinated Americans Enjoying Biden’s ‘Winter Of Severe Illness And Death’
U.S.-- Millions of happy, unvaccinated Americans have been out having fun and…
Here Are The Top 10 Hottest, Most Unique Gifts This Christmas
U.S.-- With the holiday season quickly approaching, now's your last chance to…