World’s First Chimpanzee Chiropractor Doesn’t Know His Own Strength
(PARODY) Commercial for Dr. Bongo's Primate Chiropractic, the world's first chimpanzee chiropractor…
Scientists Successfully Teach Man In Parrot Costume To Say Swear Words
PALO ALTO, CALIFORNIA-- In what is being hailed as a groundbreaking leap…
In New Book, Franklin The Turtle Develops Myocarditis After The COVID Vaccine
CANADA-- In a devastating plot twist, beloved Canadian children's book character Franklin…
Trump Declares Jive Turkey Pardon ‘Historic Civil Rights Achievement’
WASHINGTON-- In a move the Trump campaign is calling "transformative for race…
Dr. Fauci Spotted Wearing Furry Costume Luring Beagles Into Secret Basement Lab
WASHINGTON-- Local dog owners have been on high alert after it was…
With Government Shutdown, Furloughed Scientists Forced To Conduct Lab Experiments On Family Members
WASHINGTON-- As the government shutdown stretches into its fifth week, reports are…
Trump Welcomes Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese To White House
WASHINGTON-- In typical Aussie "Down-Under" fashion, Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese arrived at…
Canada Geese Frustrated That Immigrants Keep Pooping On Their Territory
TORONTO, CANADA-- Tensions have been escalating in the Great White North as…
U.S. Sends Goat Ambassador To Afghanistan To Woo Taliban Into Returning Bagram Air Base
WASHINGTON-- In a bizarre attempt to reclaim Bagram Air Base from the…
British Man Jailed For 10 Years After Dog Accidentally ‘Likes’ Anti-UK Government Post
LONDON - In a shocking display of the UK's escalating war on…
British Police Deploy ‘Flag Sniffer Dogs’ Trained To Detect Citizens Hiding England Flags Inside Their Homes
LONDON, ENGLAND - In a shocking move to combat "hate symbols," the…
Mark Carney Ecstatic Over Which Elderly Air Canada Flight Attendant To Horse-Stomp First
TORONTO, CANADA-- Taking a page out of his predecessor Justin Trudeau's playbook,…