LONDON, UK — Metropolitan Police officials were reportedly facing a difficult decision Sunday after being forced to choose between stopping a terrorist attack against a US air base and arresting an elderly grandmother who had shared a Facebook cat meme deemed potentially offensive.
According to internal reports, counter-terrorism officers initially rushed to respond to reports of a suspected terrorist plot before receiving an alert about a 75-year-old woman in Kent who had allegedly posted a meme containing “potentially inflammatory content” on Facebook.
“This is an extremely challenging situation,” said one Metropolitan Police official. “On the one hand, we have a potentially serious terrorist threat. On the other, Brenda from Kent has shared a picture of a cat wearing a Union Jack and captioned it ‘You can’t say anything anymore,’ which could potentially cause someone on the internet to feel a fleeting sense of anxiety. The threat to public safety from that meme was simply unprecedented.”
The specialized police unit pointed out that while the terror suspects were plotting mass destruction, they had not actually posted anything offensive on X (formerly Twitter) all week, whereas the elderly grandma was guilty of active, digital violence.
At publishing time, UK Prime Minister Andy Burnham commended the police for their bravery, assuring the nation that while the US air base situation was a minor inconvenience, the streets of Britain were finally safe from elderly women with WiFi connections.
