WELLINGTON, NH– In a move corporate spokespeople are calling strategically inclusive, Planet Fitness has named notorious serial killer Jame “Buffalo Bill” Gumb as its 2026 Trans Ambassador of the Year and the new face of its Judgement Free Zone, also updating their gym’s tagline to “We’ll Welcome Anyone, Even if They Literally Want to Wear Your Skin.”
The move comes after the gym chain faced backlash for allowing biological men to undress in the women’s locker room and also commit numerous perverted acts in front of females.
“We pride ourselves on inclusion,” said Planet Fitness VP of Marketing Clarisse Lecter. “And on principle we don’t let facts determine who enjoys our locker rooms and showers. If someone identifies as a customer, they’re welcome. Even if they moonlight sewing dresses out of human dermis. Who are we to judge?”
Buffalo Bill, who was known for drugging and flaying women to make a “woman suit” from their skin, expressed his gratitude to the gym for embracing him as his true self. In a video posted to the Planet Fitness Instagram, Bill said, “I’ve always felt like I was a woman trapped in a man’s body, and Planet Fitness is the first place where I felt accepted. Planet Fitness is the perfect place to find overweight females with tender skin.”
Planet Fitness later defended the hiring of Buffalo Bill once again after the deranged maniac was caught skinning women alive in the locker rooms, calling it free expression and later banning the skinned women from the gym for being transphobic.
