SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA– For the tenth consecutive year, local liberal and self-proclaimed “justice enthusiast” Karen Pritchard threw her much-anticipated “Trump’s Going to Prison Any Minute Now” party on Saturday, undeterred by the fact that Donald J. Trump remains a free man, currently serving as the 47th president of the United States.
“This is it, it’s going to happen any minute now,” shouted Karen angrily to the party attendees, waving a tattered “Lock Trump Up 2016” flag she’s been reusing since the first event. “I can feel it. This is the year that the orange-skinned buffoon finally goes to prison and we celebrate justice. Trump’s arrest is only hours away–no, minutes away. The feds are going to make the arrest any moment now. Robert Mueller’s coming after Trump. Even though he’s retired, I’m sure he’s still working behind the scenes.”
Karen and her guests then began playing some fun and relaxing party games, such as beating a Trump shaped piñata with a spiked baseball bat and cutting the head off of a life-size Trump in an orange jumpsuit cardboard cutout before setting everything on fire.
The party ended with everyone doing a “Prison Sentence Countdown” for the tenth year in a row where everyone chanted “Ten! Nine! Eight!…” as if Trump’s arrest were only seconds away.
