WASHINGTON– Only hours after violent floods ripped through parts of Texas, Democrats cited concerns of indecisiveness as they struggled to figure out if they wanted to blame the flooding on Trump, Russia, Elon, racism, climate change, ICE, or White supremacy.
During an emergency meeting in Washington in an effort to get their stories straight, both Senate and House Democrats decided easily that they were going to blame the flooding on something but just couldn’t decide on which one of their usual excuses they wanted to use.
“Well, most of the time we put the blame on either Trump or Russia,” said Senator Elizabeth Warren as her colleagues argued amongst themselves. “We could use a combination of a few of our choices. You know, we could blame the flooding on racist, Russian ICE officers who drive a Tesla.”
Warren commented that perhaps they should even come up with a new boogieman to blame their problems on being that most Americans don’t believe anything coming from Democrats.
The ingenious Democrats eventually chose to just pick one of the excuses from out of a hat and were finally able to settle on blaming the Texas floods on “Size XL.”
