OTTAWA, CANADA– In a move that left millions of Canadians scratching their heads, Prime Minister Mark Carney has been spotted awkwardly waving a maple leaf flag and mumbling the lyrics to “O Canada” after reportedly losing a bet to an unnamed international financier at a Davos afterparty.
People began questioning why the prime minister was so patriotic on Monday being that Mark Carney is well-known for his disdain for both Canada and the Canadian people. Sources confirmed that Carney had great difficulty pretending to deeply care about The Great White North country.
“Um, oh my, I love Canada so much, I really do,” stammered Mark Carney begrudgingly while holding up a little Canadian flag. “I decided to stop trying to destroy Canada. From now on, I will do everything in my power to make Canada great again. I promise.”
Speaking anonymously, one of Carney’s aides said he lost a bet to a very powerful WEF member, which stipulated that if he lost he would have to feign patriotism and try to act like a real, proud Canadian for one day.
Carney ended the day by donning his famous “Elbows Up” hockey jersey and chugging an entire bottle of maple syrup. “Is this what the common man drinks?” Carney asked, trying to relate.
After his punishment for losing the bet was over by Tuesday, Carney doubled down on his hatred for Canada and promised to destroy the country even faster.
