WASHINGTON– As Americans get ready to celebrate Independence Day and wonder how they’ll pay for the extremely high grocery prices caused by Biden, an incensed President Joe Biden told potential voters that if they reelect him to the White House this November then he’ll go after whoever the current president is causing citizens so much distress.
“Folks, I feel your pain about the inflation being caused by the current president,” said Biden during an inflation speech in an effort to sway people to vote Democrat. “Even though the prices don’t affect me personally since I’m a multimillionaire many times over, if you send me back to the White House I promise I’ll hold this current president ‘what’s his name’ responsible for causing this mess.”
Biden went on to say that even though he can’t remember the name of the current president, he remembers that the commander-in-chief is an old, white-haired, senile, perverted criminal who now has orange skin and mumbles a lot of gibberish.
“I’m calling on the current president to come out here right now and debate me on his horrible track record,” said Biden angrily as he farted out a few syllables. “If you want high prices then vote for me. If you want low prices then vote for that other guy. The choice is clear.”
After waiting a minute for the current president to show up, Biden told the crowd of confused news reporters that there’s nothing wrong with his cognitive state and then began arguing with an invisible man about how he plans on beating him in the upcoming presidential race.
