NEW YORK, NEW YORK– Due to the ongoing Boeing plane malfunctions epidemic, the world’s most trusted drug company Pfizer announced that they have created a new vaccine called Boevax that will protect susceptible passengers against the effects of the shoddy planes coming apart while in flight.
“We’re pleased to announce the creation of our latest anti-dying-from-a-Boeing-plane vaccine Boevax,” said Pfizer spokesperson Kash Munnie on a ‘paid for by Pfizer’ CNN program. “It took our top scientists a whole three hours to come up with the Boevax Boeing plane vaccine. We guarantee it will be just as safe and effective as our COVID vaccine that may or may not be killing millions of people.”
Once word got out that the Boeing plane vaccine was now readily available, a large influx of already COVID-boosted people began flooding their local drugstores to get the experimental Boevax shot that suddenly went to market in only two days and never underwent human trials due to the fact that it killed every animal it was tested on.
President Joe Biden heralded the experimental plane vaccine as a miracle in modern medicine and urged all Americans to get the mystery serum injected into their bodies to protect against the plane virus and to also respect the other vaccinated passengers on the plane who will also die once the dysfunctional plane crashes.
Dr. Fauci gave an interview explaining that the Pfizer Boevax vaccine is totally safe and has called on Biden to make the shot mandatory for everyone. He also said that he will be testing the new vaccine on all the beagle puppies in his neighborhood by injecting them with disease-causing parasites.
