Big Bird Arrested For Peddling Medical Misinformation

MANHATTAN, NEW YORK– Beloved Sesame Street character Big Bird was arrested this morning after the large, yellow bird was accused of peddling false information regarding the safety and efficacy of the COVID vaccine, and is facing possible murder charges for all the children he coerced into getting the experimental gene therapy injection.

“Big Bird is being charged with taking bribes to coerce young children into getting the COVID shot,” said District Attorney Sebastian Stark. “Thousands of children even as young as five have been permanently injured due to the now well-known deleterious effects of the COVID vaccine.”

DA Stark pointed to one of Big Bird’s Twitter tweets from November 2021, where the bird wrote that the COVID-19 vaccine kept people healthy, which has been proven to be untrue with the latest evidence.

Stark added, “Big Bird used his celebrity status to line his feathery pockets by tricking kids into telling their parents that the only thing they wanted for Christmas was to be jabbed with multiple needles and injected with an experimental serum that would leave them with heart problems and for some even death.”

On television Big Bird tried scaring children into getting the shot, saying if they didn’t then he wouldn’t be their friend anymore.

“Can you kids say ‘myocarditis’?” Big Bird asked on a now deleted Sesame Street episode. “Any little boys and girls who don’t get the vaccine are not a friend of Big Bird. If you don’t get the shot then monsters will come out from under your bed at night and eat your faces off.”

Numerous supporters of Big Bird claim the Sesame Street character is being used as a fall guy so that the bigger fish like Dr. Fauci and Bill Gates can escape punishment for the millions of deaths they have caused.

When asked for comment, both Fauci and Gates stated they were just following Big Bird’s orders and that they were scared for their lives because of Big Bird’s connections with Hillary Clinton and her hit squad.