TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDA– Once Florida and Texas heard that Los Angeles officials had banned official travel to the two states, millions of people in both states began celebrating the great news by throwing a large bash at the capital cities.
“This is the greatest news I’ve heard in a while,” said Pauly Yakkennelli, a Republican resident from Florida. “Any method we can use to get rid of the libtards is fine with me.”
Florida’s Governor Ron DeSantis gave a rousing speech at the governor’s mansion in Tallahassee in front of a crowd of over 50,000 cheering citizens, saying that if he knew it was that easy to keep the leftists out of his state then he would have done it a long time ago.
“It is my pleasure to announce that far-left politicians from California won’t be coming to visit us anytime soon,” said DeSantis as the raucous crowd kept chanting to keep them out. “With my leadership and that of the governor of Texas, perhaps more red states will soon follow and keep out the Democrats by simply passing legislation to stop teachers from grooming our young children.”
Many angry leftwing politicians and other liberal officials from L.A. bragged on Twitter about how they won and are punishing Florida and Texas by not coming there to poison the states with their Marxist propaganda.
“Ha, we really showed Governor DeSantis who’s boss,” said Yolanda Stalin, a board supervisor from California. “If we just keep up the pressure and refuse to travel to those two states then it’ll only be a matter of time before those homophobic Republicans are begging us to come back to groom their kids.”
Not able to survive without feeding off a host, numerous leftist L.A. politicians began crossing over the Texas and Florida borders at night to be able to partake in the freedoms and luxuries that only conservative states can offer.
