UNITED KINGDOM- One week after Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s bombshell news announcement that they weren’t happy with the Royal Family playing favorites with their members, Queen Elizabeth used her majestic powers to banish the ungrateful couple to live an entire chaotic year in the U.S. under Donald Trump’s presidency.
Queen Elizabeth II got the ingenious idea after overhearing Markle, 38, on the phone with D-list Hollywood actress Rose McGowan saying that her greatest fear in life would be to have to live under the “circus-like” dictatorship of “orange-skinned misogynist” President Trump.
Markle was also overheard telling McGowan that she would much rather live in a more peaceful and safer country with more freedoms, such as Iran or China, than in the oppressive United States.
The Duke of Sussex, 35, met with his grandmother to discuss a resolution, such as begging Queen Elizabeth to only send his wife Meghan to the United States and to let him stay in the comfort of the U.K.
With tears in his eyes, a sobbing Prince Harry stated that the whole “stepping back” debacle was his wife’s idea, causing him to second-guess his decision to marry a foreigner from the U.S. with only B-movies and commercials on her resume.
Following the tense meeting, which involved Prince Harry saying that he would rather divorce his wife than spend the next year in America, Her Majesty released a public statement to the Daily Mail.
“Today Harry, William, Charles, and I had a constructive discussion,” the Queen’s statement began. “And we all decided that it would be in the best interest of the Royal Palace to send the unappreciative Harry and Meghan to the United States to learn the true meaning of humility.
“While living in President Trump’s MAGA country, Harry and Meghan must attend every scheduled Trump rally, speech, news conference, and will go everywhere the president goes, while their son Archie watches The Apprentice reruns for ten hours a day.”
