Biden Mandates That All Women Must Let Him Sniff Their Hair
WASHINGTON-- Immediately after virtue-signaling by getting his saline booster shot on live…
Justin Trudeau Promises To Be More Caring Dictator After Winning Totally Legitimate Election
OTTAWA, CANADA-- After winning Canada's most legitimate election in history in a…
An Impatient Joe Biden Hires Freddy Krueger To Vaccinate Hesitant People While They’re Sleeping
WASHINGTON-- Joe Biden has finally reached his breaking point in trying to…
Newly Unearthed: Over 2,000 Year Old Confucius Quote Telling Future Americans To Take COVID Vaccine
BEIJING, CHINA-- A never-before-seen quote from famed Chinese philosopher Confucius has been…
Joe Biden Says Farsighted White Hens Are America’s Number One Domestic Terrorists
WASHINGTON-- At a recent earthshattering news conference in a lookalike White House…
New CDC Guidelines Now Say Dead People Only Need To Wear Three Masks When Buried
ATLANTA, GEORGIA-- The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) announced new…
Funeral Homes Offering Free Tombstones To Anyone Who Shows Proof Of Vaccination
SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA-- Great news to everyone who gets the COVID-19 vaccine.…
Proud Mother Adopts COVID Vaccine After Aborting Real Unborn Baby
PORTLAND, OREGON-- It looks like another needy coronavirus vaccine has found a…
Miracle: Joe Biden Cures Kamala Harris Of Head Lice After Sniffing Her Hair
WASHINGTON-- In what is being considered nothing less than a miracle, Joe…
Racist Dr. Seuss Books Reinstated After It’s Revealed Author Was A Liberal Democrat
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Cancel culture has officially apologized for censoring…
Coronavirus Comes Forward And Accuses Andrew Cuomo Of Sexual Harassment
ALBANY, NEW YORK-- The COVID-19 virus is the latest victim to come…
Biden Voters Justify Syria Bombing Saying At Least They Got Rid Of Trump’s Mean Tweets
WASHINGTON-- Immediately after Joe Biden ordered the entire country of Syria to…
