HANGZHOU, CHINA– In a move described as on the nose, President Xi Jinping spent the third day of the 2026 Beijing-Washington Summit giving Donald Trump a VIP tour of the Hangzhou Global Manufacturing Complex, the primary facility responsible for producing Trump’s “official” line of patriotic merchandise.
The tour of the manufacturing plant saw the two world leaders strolling past miles of assembly lines where thousands of workers were meticulously stitching “100% American Pride” labels into the linings of polyester Trump-branded sport coats.
“We wanted to show the President the efficiency of our partnership,” Xi Jinping said through a translator while pointing at a group of workers currently sewing “Trump 2028” flags. “Here, we can manufacture a sense of American populist fervor at a 40% lower cost than in Ohio. We consider this the ultimate bridge between our two cultures: Chinese labor, American branding, and a total disregard for the irony involved.”
The Trump campaign later released a statement clarifying that while the Bibles, the shoes, the watches, and the hotel towels are made in China, the “Make America Great Again” labels themselves are proudly printed in a basement in Pennsylvania.
At press time, Trump was reportedly seen telling Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent to ensure the upcoming shipment of 100,000 Trump Bibles was listed on the shipping manifest as educational toys to avoid his own 60% tariff.
