NEW DELHI, INDIA — During his recent trip to India, Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney triumphantly announced a landmark foreign investment after negotiating a deal with the Indian government to import millions more Indian immigrants into Canada, effectively further flooding the country with foreign labor and eroding national identity.
The historic deal, which promises to fundamentally reshape the Canadian economy, involves zero exchange of goods, no new tariffs, and exactly zero dollars in corporate funding, totally ignoring the widespread public outcry against mass immigration policies by Canadians.
“This triumphant foreign investment is a massive win for Canada,” Mark Carney declared, his voice cracking from lying. “India has graciously agreed to supply us with an endless stream of international students and gig-economy entrepreneurs, and in exchange, Canada has agreed to surrender its remaining inventory of two-bedroom apartments.”
Carney went on to say that this significant deal will “create many jobs and stimulate economic growth” for everyone in the Great White North country other than native White Canadians.
At press time, Carney was reportedly exploring additional foreign investment opportunities, including increasing accessibility of the MAID program to export more White Canadians to the afterlife.
