LONDON, UK– Being hailed as a hero by British citizens, Larry the Cat, Chief Mouser to the Cabinet Office, has caught a large rat inside Prime Minister Keir Starmer’s office at 10 Downing Street. Witnesses report the rodent, later identified as Starmer himself, was seen scurrying around the Prime Minister’s desk, searching for his Islamic prayer rug.
“It was a typical rat move, sneaky, underhanded, and completely contemptuous of the British people,” declared Reform Party Leader Nigel Farage to news reporters. “Larry just did what the public wishes they could when the feline grabbed the bespectacled fat bastard by the scruff of his neck and gave him a good shake.”
The incident has sparked widespread celebration across the UK, with many calling it “the purr-fect metaphor” for Starmer’s contemptible tenure as prime minister.
“We always knew he was a good-for-nothing, corrupt rat,” added Farage. “I actually feel sorry for poor ole Larry who I hear still can’t get the disgusting taste of that rodent out of his mouth. Larry is a patriotic hero who may have saved England.”
The Prime Minister’s office has since released a statement claiming Starmer and Larry the Cat were simply “playing,” with the prime minister later calling for Larry’s arrest.
When asked for comment, Larry said it was simply just doing it’s job of keeping Downing Street rodent-free, and that there were a few more Labour Party rats it intended on catching.
