WASHINGTON– With New York City Mayoral candidate Zohran Mamdani’s popularity continuing to increase, former President Barack Obama took the Ugandan-born Muslim under his wing and taught him the best way to forge a birth certificate just in case he ever decides to become president of the United States.
The two Democrats met at Obama’s mansion in Washington DC, with the Kenyan-born former president giving Mamdani tips and tricks on how to become Commander-in-Chief even when not born in the US.
“Zohran, word around the street is that you’re going places,” said Obama, giving Zohran a hug and a totally platonic ass grab. “My handlers said they have big plans for you in the future, maybe even presidential. Like me, you weren’t born in the United States. But trust me, brother, we won’t let that stop you from getting into the White House and screwing everything up like I did.”
Obama then pulled out both his real and fake birth certificate to show the foreign born Zohran how he got it accomplished and also fooled millions of people.
“All you have to do is pay the right people the right amount of money,” said Obama as Zohran appeared impressed. “And you also have to leverage your power to get things done. Then once you get your counterfeit birth certificate, just quietly set up a plane crash for the person who forged it just in case they ever decided to tell anyone.”
Obama also showed Zohran how to fool the world into thinking your wife is actually a woman.
