U.S.– As Election Day draws closer and Democrat voting machines decide who the next president will be, Democrat candidate Kamala Harris said during a recent town hall event that she credits her two top political advisors Jack Daniel’s and Jim Beam for helping her get through all of her campaign speeches, rallies, and ability to get up every morning.
After staggering out onto the stage and then cackling for five straight minutes, Vice President Kamala Harris told the crowd of confused people that Jack Daniel’s and Jim Beam deserve all the credit for every speech she has ever given and also for her erratic behavior.
“I couldn’t have done all this without my two favorite boys,” said Kamala in slurred speech as she stared up at the ceiling thinking that’s where the audience was located. “Mr. Daniel’s and Mr. Beam have given me the courage to be able to unburden my nervousness of public speaking from what has been done, and from what will be. They’re so good in fact that I may also bring them into my administration when I beat Trump in December, or whenever that election thing is.”
Kamala then surprised the audience by bringing Daniel’s and Beam out onto the stage by reaching into her jacket pockets and then holding the two bottles up high into the air.
In addition to Daniel’s and Beam, Harris also gave credit to two of her other political aides Xanax and Prozac.
