WASHINGTON– On the anniversary of January 6, New York Congresswoman AOC visited a local graveyard to give a touching eulogy for the 6,969.50 AOC’s that died on that horrific day.
Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez was in tears as she fumbled through her emotional remembrance speech and recounted how frightening it was to die so many times in such a short time thanks to then-President Donald trump callously snapping his finger and erasing half of life in the universe.
“Even though I died almost 7,000 times on January 6th, I’m still here to tell my story,” said AOC, leaving a carrot in front of every one of her tombstones in case her ghosts get hungry. “Even cats only have to die nine times, but thanks to Mr. Trump I had to suffer, uh, hold on, let me check my calculator. Yes, I died 6,969 times and also a half death because that last AOC is still in the hospital in a coma.”
Reputable news outlets CNN and MSNBC each devoted nine hour marathon programs to examine every one of AOC’s deaths in full detail by totally disregarding all the released January 6 footage that shows her clearly not dying and informed their braindead viewers that they are not allowed to see the real footage because of the graphic nature of seeing almost 7,000 deaths of AOC disappearing into thin air.
Democrats in Congress have moved to get January 6th turned into a federal holiday and if passed the new holiday will be called the “January 6 Insurrection Capitol Riot Where Big Meanie Donald Trump Snapped His Finger And Ended The Life Of AOC 6,969 Times And A Half Death Due To One AOC Being In A Coma But Could Pass Away At Any Time Memorial Day.”