OTTAWA, CANADA– During a meeting where they praised a WW2 veteran who fought for the Nazis, Canada’s House of Commons also proudly unveiled an updated one hundred dollar bill with German dictator Adolf Hitler’s face on it to the cheers and standing ovations of the attending politicians.
“Today, I’m proud to announce a new one hundred dollar bill commemorating the greatest man ever to live, Adolf Hitler,” said Prime Minister Justin Trudeau while Parliament members gave the Nazi salute. “It is my honor to recognize the head of the Nazi Party who fought so valiantly against the bigoted, white supremacist, anti-Semitic Russian Soviets with his image on our Canadian currency.”
Before Trudeau even finished his first sentence, the entire House of Commons gave a five minute standing ovation. Also in attendance was Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelensky who was brought to tears at the sight of the former German leader who stood his ground and never gave up the fight against the Russians.
“This is beautiful, thank you Mr. Hitler for everything you tried to do,” said a sobbing Zelensky, staring at an enlarged photo of the Hitler hundred dollar bill. “I will do my best to finish what you started and I won’t stop until every last vermin has been extinguished.”
Trudeau said he plans on continuing his quest to be more like his idol Hitler by creating more COVID camps, euthanasia clinics, and will also freeze the bank accounts and imprison anyone who doesn’t refer to him as “Mein Führer.”
