PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA– Millions of Comcast customers across the country woke up this morning to a major service outage, causing significant problems around the US and prompting Xfinity to admit that their uncoordinated CEO is the cause of the catastrophic shutdown.
According to a tweet put out by Comcast on Twitter, around 7 am the CEO of the billion dollar cable company was tiptoeing through the main database room trying not to wake up his sleeping employees when he accidentally stumbled over the central power cord that connects all the service to the entire country.
“We apologize for the service interruption, but our bumbling CEO has two left feet,” wrote Comcast in a tweet explaining the reason for the outage. “We’ll return your service as soon as our world-class technicians figure out how to plug the cord back into the wall.”
Many angry Xfinity customers took to social media to vent their frustrations out on the blundering man who’s somehow running one of the world’s biggest internet service providers.
“This is the third time this month I’ve loss service due to this lumbering moron CEO,” wrote irate customer Tommy DeVito on Twitter. “Just last week my service was shut off due to that Xfinity klutz spilling his frothy Starbucks Frappuccino all over their computer servers.”
This isn’t the first time the awkward CEO of Comcast has been the cause of a major internet blackout. Just two weeks ago, the chief executive officer caused a similar service shutdown in the northeast area after he unintentionally slipped on a banana peel and knocked over the headquarters’ mainframe computer, causing a three day outage and millions in damages.
Comcast sux..