SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA– A San Diego man was recently released from a hospital for injuries to his scrotum that he had sustained while visiting a local petting zoo and he is now suing for damages.
Ken Escroto, 38, was at the Strange Mange Petting Zoo with friends and had entered into the goat petting area. That’s when, says Escroto, a feisty female goat named Gabby attacked his genitals and ripped off his scrotum with its powerful goat teeth.
Escroto was immediately laughed at and ridiculed by zoo patrons and employees before he was taken by ambulance to a local hospital.
The victim lost a great deal of blood, but was able to recover enough to be sent home. Unfortunately, Escroto was not able to have his scrotum reattached because his friends were unable to pry the man’s hairy testicles from the goat’s mouth before it swallowed them.
Witnesses at the zoo say that Escroto was taunting the goat by hiding goat cheese inside of his shorts pocket. Signs posted at the zoo state that no one should enter into the goat petting area with food inside of their pockets.
The owners of the petting zoo have filed a counter claim against Escroto, saying that their goat became sick and died after consuming the man’s scrotum.
Even though goats are known for their ability to eat just about anything, veterinarians claim that human flesh is definitely not on that list.
“A goat’s digestive system wasn’t meant to consume human meat,” said a local veterinarian. “Just like humans weren’t meant to eat goat things, like tin cans and cardboard. The goat’s sickness was exacerbated because the scrotum was extremely hairy.”
Funeral services for Gabby the goat will be held inside of a trash can at the Strange Mange Petting Zoo on Friday at 4 pm.
