BALD KNOB, ARIZONA– Police are working overtime in the hopes of catching a man who’s been going around Bald Knob stealing toupees right off of men’s heads.
Bald Knob police officers responded to another 911 toupee theft call this morning after the toupee bandit struck a 95 year old senior citizen wearing a pitch-black wig.
The 95 year old man was attacked after leaving the local Bald Knob strip club.
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Police say that the toupee bandit has stolen at least 50 toupees from various men as they walked down streets, got into their cars, or stopped to adjust their hairpieces while gazing at their reflection in a window.
Local authorities have asked President Donald Trump to sign an executive order to make wig stealing a capital offense, punishable by death.
Anyone with information about the toupee bandit case can call the local Bald Knob Wig Outlet and ask them why they can’t produce a more realistic-looking toupee.
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