MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA — Following a nationwide PR disaster, Target executives issued a sweeping apology Monday after the retailer came under fire for selling a children’s blacklight clown costume that critics condemned as resembling minstrel blackface, responding to the controversy by offering black customers 10% off their next purchase of fried chicken.
“We at Target deeply regret that this insensitive costume ever made it onto our shelves,” said Target CEO Brian Cornell during an emotional press conference held beside the company’s Halloween display. “We understand that we have caused pain, and we want to assure the Black community that we are listening, learning, and immediately taking corrective action by issuing an exclusive digital coupon for 10% off Target’s store-brand fried chicken to smooth things over.”
Cornell said Target’s new “Healing Together” initiative, which includes a coupon for 10% off fried chicken, collard greens, watermelon-flavored beverages, and several other products was not intended to perpetuate racial stereotypes, but rather to celebrate cultural traditions through the universal language of savings.
“We know every little bit helps, especially for a demographic with such a notoriously low employment rate,” Cornell added with a reassuring smile.
At press time, Target’s remaining design team was reportedly locked in a desperate boardroom meeting, trying to figure out how to quietly cancel their upcoming Black History Month line of glowing cotton-picking playsets before anyone noticed.
