DENVER, COLORADO– In a unanimous 7-0 decision, the Colorado Supreme Court has ruled that President Joe Biden will remain on the ballot in an effort to punish Americans even more, only days after their recent decision to remove former President Donald Trump from it.
Hundreds of mourners stood outside the courthouse in tears once they heard the news that Biden will remain on the ballot, giving him the chance to possibly be voted in again for another four years of misery.
“I understand it was a controversial decision to leave President Biden on the ballot,” said Justice Willie B. Hardigan in his opinion. “But the American people have not been broken enough. Taking Trump off the ballot was only the beginning. Another four years of Biden screwing everything up will make them even more compliant.”
The Colorado Supreme Court also made a few other controversial decisions recently, including requiring all pet dogs to be fully clothed whenever out in public, banning the use of the word “hello” when greeting someone, and demanding the Rick character from the cartoon show Rick and Morty be removed on any episode that airs on Colorado television stations.
When reached for comment, Biden said he was very displeased with the court’s decision to leave him on the ballot and had hoped that could’ve been his excuse not to have to run again.
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