WASHINGTON– As the word “Palestine” keeps getting repeated ad nauseam on news channels across the country, a confused President Joe Biden couldn’t help but think that the word “Palestine” sounded familiar and there was somewhere he was supposed to go and visit for some reason.
“Dammit, I can’t shake this feeling that there’s somewhere I’m supposed to go, Jack,” said Biden as he tapped his finger against his wrinkled dueling chins. “Am I supposed to go to Delaware? No, I just came back from my 666th vacation. Is it the bathroom? No, I just crapped my pants. I can’t think with this TV yapping about some place somewhere named Palestine. Hey, Jill, can you turn this malarkey down?”
In an effort to try and jog his memory of where he was supposed to go, Biden called in all his advisors and asked them to start naming every location in the entire world until eventually he remembers what place he was supposed to visit.
While all his advisors kept telling him that he was supposed to drop nuclear bombs on Iran and then go on vacation, Biden suddenly remembered the location after hearing another news story about Palestine.
“Now I remember, no thanks to you, you stupid bastards,” said Biden before challenging a man in a wheelchair to a pushup competition. “Hearing about Palestine just jogged my memory that I was supposed to drop nuclear bombs on Iran and then go on vacation.”
After hearing the word “Palestine” again, Biden finally remembered he was supposed to send something to East Palestine but instead dropped the nukes that were meant for Iran on top of the Ohio village.
