KIEV, UKRAINE– As the money began drying up due to more Americans losing interest in Ukraine and now supporting Israel, Volodymyr Zelensky decided to change his image by modeling himself after Benjamin Netanyahu and flying the flag of Israel in an effort to win back the spotlight and rake in the cash once again.
While sitting at his desk in front of a flag of Israel, Zelensky introduced his new face to the world and told everyone that he now also goes by the name Benjamin Netanyahu and Ukraine will also be known as Israel.
“Greetings, my fellow Israeli citizens,” said Netanyahu 2.0 as the camera zoomed in on his balding white hair combover. “My name is Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, formerly known as President Zelensky. As I’m sure you are already aware, we here in Israel need your financial support so that we can defeat the Hamas Palestinians, formerly known as Russians.”
Netanyahu 2.0 went on to say that he was also a Jew by birth just like the real Netanyahu and his country was also invaded by a terrorist group, only his situation was much worse than Israel and required a lot more money to fight back.
“Why don’t you love me anymore?” Zelensky cried out due to him disappearing from the news cycle after Israel became the new current thing. “I’m the real Netanyahu, not the imposter in the Middle East pretending to me. The Ukraine has always been Israel and we’ve been fighting the Russians, I mean, Muslim terrorists for centuries. Now send me money. Who does Netanyahu think he is taking money out of my pocket.”
After realizing that he could double the money if he combined both Ukraine and Israel, Zelensky changed his name once again to Volodymyr Netanyahu and cut the country in half and renamed it to Ukraine-Israel.