ATLANTA, GEORGIA– America’s most trusted news source CNN has reported that the carnage happening in both Israel and Gaza are simply fiery but mostly peaceful protests between the Israelis and Hamas.
A reporter for CNN was on the scene as Hamas fired rockets into Israel and then also reported during the Israeli air strikes that decimated multiple buildings.
“Nothing much to see here,” said the CNN reporter calmly while rockets flew by his head and people screamed for their lives. “Eh, this is mostly a peaceful protest and not really generally unruly, but there may kind of, sort of be a few fires here and there and possibly a few people with a couple flesh wounds.”
CNN cameras panned over toward a truckload of Hamas terrorists shouting and shooting at an apartment complex as the CNN news program flashed a chyron across the bottom of the screen that read: FIERY BUT MOSTLY PEACEFUL PROTESTS IN ISRAEL-GAZA.
“We have sort of a merry caravan passing by us right now,” said the reporter in reference to the terrorist vehicles. “I have to point out that this Israel-Palestine conflict has been almost entirely peaceful, sometimes angry, but entirely peaceful. I’ve been shot at a few times, but for the most part it’s been very, very peaceful.”
After Joe Biden got the United States destroyed in a nuclear world war, CNN’s last broadcast claimed that the nuclear fallout with Americans getting vaporized was a little rowdy but mostly calm.