NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK– Still fuming at Florida’s recently passed “Don’t Say Gay” legislation, Democrat-run New York City has responded by passing the “Don’t Say Straight” bill which not only bans saying the word “straight” but also bans straight people from entering into the city.
New York City Mayor Eric Adams announced the new anti-straight law in solidarity with the LGBTQ community, saying heterosexual people are not welcome in the Big Apple and should either immediately move to Florida or become gay and stay to enjoy the canoodling and debauchery with members of the same sex.
“Starting today, it will be illegal to say the S-word here in New York City,” said Mayor Adams, referring to the word straight. “Here in New York, we won’t tolerate demonizing a particular community of people, so in response, we will be demonizing a particular community of people in retaliation.”
Adams said the “Don’t Say Straight” bill also mandates that the city needs to be renovated to make everything crooked, forbidding buildings, roads, and even trees from being straight.
The mayor proudly plastered political billboards all over town in an effort to draw gay-only people to come live in New York City, including “People say a lot of ridiculous things in New York. ‘Don’t Say Straight’ is definitely one of them,” and “Come to the city where you can say anything you want. Except for ‘Straight’, because then we’ll arrest, beat, and charge you with multiple crimes until you admit you’re one of us.”
