WASHINGTON– Tired of waiting around for the rest of the country to get vaccinated, Joe Biden decided to use 10 billion dollars from the trillion dollar infrastructure bill to build a large coliseum where the anti-vaxxers are to be fed to hungry, COVID-deranged lions with syringe teeth, aptly calling this the Kill The Unvaccinated Plan.
His Royal Highness Biden released an official decree Friday saying that his patience had finally run thin because of the millions of people who foolishly chose to be in control of their own health.
“I’m tired of all my subjects refusing my kingly demands,” Biden told reporters from the White House balcony, referring to his 900,000 executive orders. “All throughout history, the only way emperors and rulers were able to keep their peons in line was with the use of deadly force. But I like to call it ‘tough love.'”
Part of the 10 billion dollar Kill The Unvaccinated Plan will go to removing all the lion’s fangs and replacing them with extra large scary syringes filled with the totally safe COVID-19 serum. Once a lion bites one of the anti-vaxxers inside the arena, they will be injected with the vaccine right before the lions rip them to shreds and then eat them.
“I’m a very gracious ruler,” said Biden after crapping in his robe and then shaking the feces down his hairy leg. “What am I supposed to do? Let these American idiots make their own choices about their own bodies and health? What kind of senile old man do you take me for?”
Biden can vax these nuts.