ATLANTA, GEORGIA– CNN has reported that the scandalous photos of Hunter Biden released to the public are “lewd but mostly peaceful images,” debunking the Republican’s claims that the pictures were illegal, immoral, and damaging to Joe Biden’s presidential campaign.
During last night’s highly-rated broadcast, CNN displayed the chyron “LEWD BUT MOSTLY PEACEFUL IMAGES ON LAPTOP” across the screen as mostly wholesome images of drug abuse and sexual immorality involving the former vice president’s son were shown in the background.
“The images obtained from Hunter’s laptop were barely lewd but mostly peaceful,” said the CNN reporter as his nose began growing with every sentence. “The photos were mostly innocent, and largely non-illegal.”
The reporter went on to say that the Republicans are playing dirty political games by releasing the largely discreet images out to the public in an effort to drive a wedge between a loving, wise father like Joe Biden and his doting, mostly innocent son Hunter.
“There wasn’t much else to see on the unfairly hacked laptop,” the reporter added, “other than a few mostly charitable emails between Joe and Hunter Biden, showing an altruistic son willing to cut his father in on whatever deals he made instead of leaving him out. Publicizing those emails only proved the undying love between a father and son.”
