CLARK GRISWOLD, MARYLAND– Insurance spokeslizard Geico Gecko gave a news conference on the beach last week in which he discussed coming out as a chameleon while working for one of the largest insurance agencies in the United States.
As reporters held microphones and cameramen snapped photos, Gecko expressed how being open about his true identity has allowed him to gain a whole new audience and also many new fans.
“For years I hid this secret,” Gecko said in a thick Aussie accent. “Even though I knew my true fans would still accept me, I wasn’t certain how coming out would affect the general population, my career, and insurance sales.”
Not only has Gecko’s coming out experience not turned people away, insurance sales have actually skyrocketed since last week’s big revelation. If the trend keeps going up, Geico may eventually take the number one spot away from insurance company State Farm. Rumors are that State Farm executives are scrambling to come up with their own controversial revelation in an effort to boost sales. Some are speculating that a certain State Farm agent may in fact come out as not just “a guy” after all.
Gecko has denied that his coming out as a chameleon had anything to do with the fact that chameleons on average earn more money as actors than geckos.
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