ARAD, ROMANIA– A 21-year-old Romanian woman has recently given birth to a baby who doctors say is actually a full-sized 32-year-old man, making this one of the weirdest and largest births on record.
The baby, who has been nicknamed “Legs” due to kicking the doctor in the face on his way out of the womb, is already almost six feet tall and weighs an astonishing 83 kilograms, that’s almost 183 pounds.
But it isn’t the baby’s age and weight that makes this birth so unusual, it’s the fact that the baby was already born with tattoos across his body. Doctors are surmising that perhaps the prenatal drugs given to the mother caused “Legs” to be born with ridiculous-looking tribal tattoos.
Dr. Andrei Sandu was the physician who oversaw the birth of “Legs” and he was also the first one to comment on the baby’s distasteful tattoos.
“I always hated the tribal tattoo phase,” Dr. Sandu said by way of Google translator. “I hate to admit this, but when I was young I got a very distasteful tattoo of a butterfly on my lower back. Now every time I disrobe in front of my colleagues they all laugh and point and make fun of my tramp stamp.”
Thanks to advances in modern medicine, “Legs” will be able to take medication that will trick his mind into believing that the tattoos are something more masculine, such as a naked woman with a tramp stamp tattoo on her lower back.
Dr. Sandu was only slightly optimistic when he added, “Of course “Legs” will have to take this medication for the rest of his life, however long that may be. Unfortunately if he decides to go off of the medication then the shock of seeing the tribal tattoos may cause his young heart to explode.”
Adding to the misery of the tattoo situation, the mother of “Legs” died only hours after giving birth. Apparently the shock of seeing her baby with such hideous-looking tattoos caused her heart to stop beating.
Next week the family of “Legs” and his deceased mother will be holding a combination of a baby shower and a funeral.
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