MIAMI, FLORIDA– A fat rights group out of Florida is calling on Washington to do away with the term “skinny dipping”, which they say is discriminatory toward obese people.
The fat rights group, known as The Crisco Kids, has been all over news media outlets in south Florida in the hopes that someone in Washington will hear their pleas. Hugh Stoutly, chairman of The Crisco Kids, is leading the charge to get the discriminatory term removed.
“We want every single crumb of this term to disappear,” 44 year old Stoutly shouted into a megaphone directly into a reporter’s microphone. “Us larger people have taken enough flack over the years from all these skinny skeletons and it’s time for us pleasantly plump people to take a stand against discriminatory words like skinny dipping!”
This isn’t the first time discriminatory terminology has been protested against. Just a few months ago, the USPSUPS, formally known as USPS, did away with the term “mail” to describe mailboxes, now calling them gender-neutral boxes.
“Maybe someday we’ll live in a world where everyone’s equal,” Stoutly shouted as he held up an anti-skinny dipping sign. “To show our outrage at this term, me and five hundred other plump Americans will be going to Miami Beach and swimming naked in protest! Or better yet, maybe we’ll open up our own beach with signs only for chubby-dippers!”
Next week The Crisco Kids will be protesting a local Old Navy store that still insists on selling skinny jeans.
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