John Fetterman Hires Caveman To Help Improve His Public Speaking Abilities
BRADDOCK, PENNSYLVANIA-- After Republican Dr. Oz tweeted that he would like a…
John Fetterman Promises If Elected He’ll Be Real Pain In The Neck For Republicans
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA-- Democratic Senate candidate John Fetterman has promised his voters that…
Major Endorsement: Chia Pet Announces Support For Beto O’Rourke
AUSTIN, TEXAS-- In a major win that may turn the tide and…
Beto O’Rourke Promises To Finish Building Border Wall, Only It’ll Be Invisible And People Can Still Walk Through It
EL PASO, TEXAS-- In an effort to reach out to Texas Republicans,…
It’s 2036, Bernie Bros Saying Sanders Still Has Chance To Win 2020 Nomination
MONTPELIER, VERMONT-- Still holding out hope that Bernie Sanders will get the…
Lizard Person Liz Cheney Removes Human Skin To Appeal To Reptile Demographic
WASHINGTON-- In a last ditch effort to help her struggling campaign to…
Fly That Landed On Mike Pence’s Head Turns Down Offer To Be His Vice President
WASHINGTON-- Former VP Mike Pence has been in the spotlight lately after…
Biden Criticizes President For Cost Of Meat, Says He’d Do Better Job If He Were In Charge
WASHINGTON-- After one of his family friends pointed out how expensive meat…
Honest Democrats Rename New Virus Outbreak The ‘Mail-In Ballot Midterm Variant’
WASHINGTON-- In a very rare moment of honesty that only comes around…
Beto O’Rourke Promises He’ll Be The First Mexican-American Governor Of Texas
AUSTIN, TEXAS-- Former Democratic US Representative Beto O'Rourke has recently announced he's…
Obama Visits New Jersey To Teach Governor Phil Murphy How To Better Lie To Voters Before Election
TRENTON, NEW JERSEY-- Former President Barack Hussein Obama spent some time in…
Accused Myanmar Leader Claims She Used Biden Strategy Of Hiding In Basement To Win Election Legitimately
NAYPYITAW, MYANMAR-- After getting arrested by Myanmar's military for alleged election fraud,…
