China Replaces Fang Fang With New And Improved Chinese Spy Tim Walz To Seduce Eric Swalwell
WASHINGTON-- Republicans in Congress have confirmed that the Chinese Communist Party has once again infiltrated the Democrat party's Eric Swalwell with yet another Chinese spy in an effort to gain…
Biden Mourns Hurricane Victims By Only Getting One Scoop Of Ice Cream
WASHINGTON-- While multiple states are still suffering from the deadly effects of Hurricane Helene, President Joe Biden showed his compassion for the thousands of hurricane victims and their families by…
Kamala Finally Visits Southern Border After Republicans Place Willie Brown Cardboard Cutouts Along Wall
EL PASO, TEXAS-- Border Czar Kamala Harris has finally visited the southern Texas border after ignoring it for almost four years following the attempts by Republicans to trick her into…
Zelensky Visits America To Thank All The Young Voters Who’ll Be Drafted If Kamala Wins
U.S.-- As wars around the world continue to escalate drawing the United States into a possible World War 3 scenario, President Volodymyr Zelensky decided to fly over to America and…
Tim Walz Goes To New York To Check In With His Boss
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- After being summoned to New York to meet with his boss Alex Soros, a worried and subservient Tim Walz quickly hopped on a plane and…
UK’s Keir Starmer Limits Immigrant Stabbing Attacks To No More Than 50 Per Day
LONDON, ENGLAND-- After the large influx of illegal alien stabbing attacks on British citizens, new Prime Minister Keir Starmer finally decided to address the serious crime epidemic by telling the…
IRS Proudly Endorses Democrat Candidate Who Hired 87,000 IRS Agents To Go After Worker’s Tips
WASHINGTON-- Another major endorsement came for Vice President Kamala Harris this week after everyone's favorite government entity the IRS proudly endorsed the Democrat candidate, saying one of the main reasons…
Kamala Promises She’s Not Confiscating Guns, She’s Just Borrowing Them And Never Returning Them
WASHINGTON-- With word spreading quickly that Kamala Harris intends on confiscating American's guns, the Democrat candidate set the record straight and eased everyone's minds by explaining she has no intention…
Gavin Newsom Claims Pooping Homeless People Are Just AI-Generated Deepfakes
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- On the heels of recently banning all AI-generated images in California, Governor Gavin Newsom has confirmed that all those images and videos of homeless people pooping everywhere all…
FBI Goes Undercover As Ghosts To Stop Illegal Ghost Car Operation
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- With ghost car crimes becoming more prevalent across the United States, the highly qualified FBI decided to take a break from arresting people for posting…
Frightened Mitch McConnell Retracts Into Shell After Hearing Threat Of Government Shutdown
WASHINGTON-- After hearing the news that the US government might shut down if an election integrity bill is not passed in Congress, Senator Mitch McConnell became startled by the news…
‘We Can Do Starbucks While We’re Getting Nuked,’ Says Oblivious Woman Voting For Kamala
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- While sitting inside of a Starbucks drinking soy lattes, two local Democrat women discussed the need to make sure Donald Trump doesn't get back into office, even…
