WASHINGTON — Democratic leaders announced Thursday that they had formally rejected an endorsement from Iran after determining that the Islamic Republic’s political positions were simply too moderate for the increasingly progressive Democratic Party.
The rejection came shortly after Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps issued an open letter urging American voters to reject President Donald Trump and back Democratic candidates in the upcoming midterm elections, prompting Democratic officials to reject the endorsement due to the Iranian regime’s political framework falling far to the right of the current party platform.
“We reviewed Tehran’s submission very carefully,” said Democratic National Committee spokesman Mark Ellison. “While we appreciate their stance on international trade agreements, we cannot in good conscience partner with a foreign power whose domestic policy reads like a 2012 Mitt Romney white paper with turbans. Unfortunately, after reviewing their platform, we realized that they’re not nearly as progressive as we are.”
Democratic officials also reportedly advised Iran that simply opposing Republicans was no longer enough to qualify as an acceptable ally of the party.
“Look, the bar has moved,” Ellison explained. “You can’t just say you don’t like Trump and expect us to put your logo on a campaign mailer.”
At press time, Iran had reportedly begun reviewing Democratic Party literature in an effort to determine what additional political positions it would need to adopt before becoming progressive enough to receive the party’s endorsement.
