PHOENIX, ARIZONA– During a campaign event in Arizona to stop more minorities from leaving the Democrat plantation, President Joe Biden told a room full of Latinos that if they’re for Trump over him then they ain’t black.
In an effort to try and relate to the Spanish-speaking crowd, Biden wore a very large Mexican sombrero hat and meandered up onto the stage where he took out his smartphone and told the crowd of confused people that he was there to make sure he keeps their vote, or else.
“Hold on a minute,” said Biden while fumbling with his phone before playing the song Despacito. “You guys hear that song? You see, I’m just like one of you tacos. I got my big hat on that you guys always wear and I’m playing one of your favorite songs. Believe me, Jack, nobody panders to minorities better than a Democrat.”
As the perplexed people in the crowd began whispering amongst themselves asking who the old white guy was wearing the big hat, Biden became enraged at the Latinos who were only there in the restaurant to eat and said, “Look, fat, here’s the deal. If you have a problem figuring out whether you’re for me or Trump, then you ain’t black. I got hairy legs, so you’re all damn liars and I challenge every one of you dog-faced pony soldiers to a pushup competition.”
After threatening the Latinos that they’d better vote for him, Biden next attended an all-black event where he took out a jar of hot sauce he just happened to have inside of his pocket and told the crowd of black voters that if they vote for Trump over him then they ain’t Latino.
