WASHINGTON– In celebration of Memorial Day, Joe Biden wanted to recognize all the heroic people of Ukraine who gave their lives fighting for corrupt US interests and to protect the Biden family’s criminal enterprise.
“Memorial Day is a day of remembrance for those who sacrificed for their country,” said Biden during an early morning speech in front of a green screen of a Ukrainian graveyard. “So I’d like to take this opportunity to thank all the brave Ukrainian folks who laid down their lives so that the American criminal enterprise can remain hidden and functioning properly.”
While holding up a flag of Ukraine, Biden bent over and then gave all the fallen Ukrainian soldiers and citizens a 21-fart salute.
“I don’t remember eating that,” said Biden in confusion after smelling his own farts. “Anyway, it’s my duty as president to see that our Ukrainian veterans are taken care of. Which is why I will be taking billions of dollars away from American veterans and sending it to Ukraine instead. Slobber Ukraini.”
In response to Biden’s heartfelt Memorial Day message, Ukraine President Zelensky thanked the US president but said that the money wasn’t enough and that more was needed for him to stay quiet about all the corruption in his country.
