Let It Grow: Ear Hair Making A Comeback

FRESNO, CALIFORNIA– The most popular style this year is giving new meaning to the phrase let your hair down.

Ear hair, or hair that grows out of the ear, has become the number one fashion trend among the celebrity world and of course the general population of celebrity worshipers has also followed suit.

People everywhere are forgoing their clippers and tweezers and letting their ear follicles do the talking for them. Not since the Middle Ages has ear hair been so popular.

Normally, ear hair starts to grow as one ages and has been a bane for most people throughout history. The ancient Egyptians were the first ones to start plucking out their ear hair due to men and women confusing their mates for camels and not realizing their faux pas until after they made love with the hairy beasts.

Cabello Loco hair stylist Byron Byron has seen a huge influx of clients coming into his salon to have their ear hair washed, styled, and braided and he says people without ear hair are paying big money to get a little fuzz around their earlobes.

“Ear hair treatments have actually surpassed other hair manipulations,” Byron Byron told The Fabulous Fashionista magazine. “My salon is the only one within a hundred miles that actually plants grass seed under someone’s ear skin to replace those with naked ears. Customers can come in every week to have their ears fertilized with the proper amount of nitrogen and rabbit droppings.”

To keep up with this fanatical trend, modeling agencies across the country have started hiring senior citizens with extreme ear hair growth to model in their magazines. Many young people are now asking older people out on dates, claiming that their woolly ears are sexy.