Little Person Wins World’s Strongest Man Competition

STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN– This year’s winner of the 2020 World’s Strongest Man is a 28 year old little person from Sweden, beating out men who outweighed him by more than 300 hundred pounds.

He’s better known for playing the role of Sven Wundergard, aka The Molehill, on Sweden’s hit show Arsel Balle, a tiny man who crushes ants with his size 2 feet. He’s also a stand-up comedian and had a walk-on part on Game of Thrones as a rogue plastic water bottle.

Standing at a height of 3 ft. and weighing a svelte 60 pounds, the actor Bange Kuk shredded his opponents to take home the title of World’s Strongest Midget Man. This was Kuk’s very first Strongman competition, so winning the title so quickly has earned him the moniker Fast Title Winner.

“Yeah, all the big guys’re calling me Fast Title Winner,” said a blonde-haired Kuk by way of translator, looking up at his trophy. “Most of my competitors admitted to me after I had won the title that they didn’t even see me competing in the events. They said they probably would’ve tried a little harder if they knew there was another man competing in the events.”

When asked by reporters if he had attracted any flack for being so inconspicuous, Kuk nodded. “Yeah, a lot of the men said I cheated,” he said as he flexed for the cameras. “I mean, why would I need to cheat? Look at the size of my arms.”

After arm wrestling a cameraman, Kuk gave everyone some inside secrets on how he defeated men who weighed almost 400 pounds and were close to 7 ft. 

“I spent less time bulking up and more time with technique,” he insisted, showing off by touching his toes without bending at the waist. “You see, the secret to winning at strength events is not in the size of your muscles or how much you bench press. It’s all about center of gravity. My shorter stature, coupled with a college degree in physics, enabled me to accurately pinpoint the correct ways to push boulders, pull cars, and inject steroids into my buttocks.”

The new strongman shared his diet plan, along with photos of his 6 ft. 5 inch wife, on all his social media sites, but pointed out that not everyone will be able to snag an attractive, tall blonde woman as a wife.

“She was my main inspiration,” he added, sitting on his wife’s lap. “Every day she tells me that I’m special for not following in the same sports as most little people, like bowling and tossing.”

When he was younger, Kuk used to be a professional basketball player, but was permanently sidelined after players on the other teams kept saying that they didn’t know there was another man on the opposing team.