Twitter Greatly Improves After Elon Musk Replaces Fired Workers With Chimpanzees
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- Immediately after Elon Musk fired a bunch of useless…
BuzzFeed Articles Suddenly Improve After Company Hires Chimpanzees As Writers
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- After laying off hundreds of useless human writers…
Meet The World’s First Chimpanzee Chiropractor
OXNARD, CALIFORNIA-- A chiropractor from Oxnard, who happens to be a chimpanzee,…
Supermarkets To Start Selling Pre-Masticated Food For People Too Lazy To Chew
WASHINGTON-- The United States Food and Drink Council recently gave food companies…
New Study Shows That Animals Are Smarter Than Most Humans
GREYBULL, WYOMING-- Researchers at the Mammalian Studies Institute in Greybull recently came…
Must See: Chimp Evolves Into Man Overnight, Proves Evolution Once And For All
BRONX, NEW YORK-- An earth-shattering discovery was made last night at the…
New Sex Cream Helps Chimps Last Longer In Bed
BALTIMORE, MARYLAND-- Scientists from Baltimore Animal College confirmed Tuesday that they've invented…
Hospital In Africa Holds ‘Surgeon For A Day’ Contest
KENYA, AFRICA-- A hospital in Kenya has announced that they are holding…
