Canadians Wondering When Real Prime Minister Going To Show Up
CANADA—Expressing a quiet, shared assumption that the current situation was temporary, millions…
Costco Canada Now Offering Bulk Euthanasia Packages For The Whole Family
OTTAWA, CANADA—In a move to further streamline the most successful healthcare initiative…
Canadian Man Finally Reaches Front Of ER Line Just In Time For Autopsy
TORONTO, ONTARIO — After what Canada Health described as a triumph of administrative…
Mark Carney Secures Historic Foreign Investment After Modi Agrees To Send Millions More Indians Into Canada
NEW DELHI, INDIA — During his recent trip to India, Canadian Prime…
Canadian Government Holds Emergency Meeting To Figure Out How To Blame Trump For Hockey Loss
OTTAWA, CANADA — In what Canadian officials described as a national narrative…
Supreme Court Rules U.S. Men’s Hockey Team Banned From Scoring Against Canada
WASHINGTON — In a landmark 6 to 3 decision, the U.S. Supreme…
Mark Carney Prevents Future Trans School Shootings By Banning All Canada Schools
OTTAWA, CANADA — In a move hailed by the Liberal government as…
China Appoints Mark Carney Provincial Party Secretary Of Canada
BEIJING, CHINA — In a move described by state media as largely…
Worried Canadians Hold Intervention For Family Member Still Doing ‘Elbows Up’
TORONTO, CANADA — Concerned Canadian relatives gathered quietly in a semi circle…
Heartbreaking News: 54-Year-Old Justin Trudeau Found Alive And Well At Davos
DAVOS, SWITZERLAND — In devastating news that has left the Great White…
Mark Carney Successfully Trades Canada’s Entire Auto Industry For Free Egg Roll And Wonton Soup
OTTAWA, CANADA-- Prime Minister Mark Carney triumphantly returned from Beijing this week,…
Prime Minister Mark Carney Promotes Himself To Supreme Minister
OTTAWA, CANADA-- After giving himself an internal performance review, Prime Minister Mark…