Secret Service Agents Didn’t See Trump Gunman Because Golf Course Was Too Sloped
WEST PALM BEACH, FLORIDA-- After another failed assassination attempt on Donald Trump where the shooter got away before being apprehended by local police, the Secret Service put out a statement…
Politician Who’s Already Struggling In Polls Threatens Nuclear War With Russia
OTTAWA, CANADA-- As his poll numbers and favorability among Canadians continue to sink lower and lower, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau came up with the brilliant idea to help his struggling…
Kamala’s Stern Warning To Russia, China If Elected: ‘I Grew Up Middle Class With A Nice Lawn’
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA-- During a rare one-on-one interview with a local Philly news station, Kamala Harris was asked what her plan was on how to deal with countries such as Russia,…
John Wick Returns For Revenge After Haitians Eat His Dog
SPRINGFIELD, OHIO-- A new John Wick movie will be released early next year starring actor Keanu Reeves, with the story revolving around the assassin coming out of retirement to seek…
‘Springfield, Ohio Residents Are Bad For Not Accepting Illegal Haitians,’ Says John Legend From Behind Walled Home In Rich White Neighborhood
BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA-- Singer John Legend has recently come to the defense of the tens of thousands illegal Haitians who have been shipped to the little town of Springfield, Ohio…
MSNBC Labels Biden ‘Far-Right MAGA Extremist Russian Asset’ After He Wore ‘Trump 2024’ Hat
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- During an event to commemorate the 911 tragedy, Joe Biden put on a "Trump 2024" MAGA hat and took pictures with the majority Republican crowd, which…
Taylor Swift Already Writing Her Next Breakup Song About Kamala Harris
U.S.-- Only hours after endorsing Kamala Harris for president, anonymous sources have said pop singer Taylor Swift has been having doubts about their relationship and has been growing tired of…
‘And Try Not To Cackle,’ Yells Obama Through Kamala’s Audio Earrings During Debate
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA-- Vice President Kamala Harris spent two weeks preparing for her debate against President Donald Trump, but still had to be reminded numerous times by Barack Obama through her…
Kamala Does Poor Job Moderating Presidential Debate Between Trump And ABC Hosts
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA-- The first presidential debate between Republican candidate Donald Trump and Democratic candidates ABC hosts David Muir and Linsey Davis has concluded and contained a chaotic exchange of words,…
CNN: ‘Why Violent Illegal Haitians Taking Over Your Neighborhood And Eating Pets Is A Good Thing’
SPRINGFIELD, OHIO-- America's most trusted news source CNN has come to the defense of the tens of thousands of illegal Haitian immigrants who have been allegedly causing havoc in Ohio,…
Cats And Dogs Come Out In Support Of Trump After Kamala’s Illegal Haitian Immigrants Keep Eating Pets
U.S.-- As news keeps spreading that illegal Haitian immigrants brought in by the Biden and Harris administration continue eating people's pets in Ohio, thousands of cats and dogs across the…
War Hawk Kamala Promises To ‘Make War Great Again’ After Receiving Endorsements From Warmongering Neocons
WASHINGTON-- Vice President Kamala Harris' team has taken to social media to brag about another major endorsement after a slew of warmongering neocon Republicans said they were supporting the Democratic…
